What does it takes?

"Sometimes I wish something in the picture won't exist, 

but I'm quite exhausted from being the only one involved in this..."

I feel like crap. The feeling of constantly being in a vicious cycle and being so silly. Why can't I just let this go once and for all and continue the life I have been living all this time? Draw that line regardless. Why am I constantly drawn to the "bad habit"?

Right now I really do miss my familiar faces, cause they are the ones that give me the strength to kick the bad habit that is killing me softly.

Regardless, if this is a sign... please stop letting it get to me. At least show it will lead to somewhere and not this messed up feelings, attachment what-so-ever I am having!!!

IN THE FIRST PLACE WHY AM I SO SILLY?! T_T

FORGET IT... JUST END WHATEVER THIS IS!!!

I'm glad I did it anyway...

I'm glad. At least I know I have let a burden of my chest. Cause when my head runs at 100miles/hour, sleeping is not an option. Now I have been given more then enough to see the light. (: 

Being silly yes for doing it more then once yes. But at least I get a proper answer for myself. (: Life goes on, the world still spins. I know I won't talk to you anymore, but it's a happy-sad thing. 

Where are we even headed to?

Are there times where you question the relationship you have with a certain someone? Like what you really mean to them?

Right now I have the world's largest dilemma to let this person go or to continue whatever we are having even though things have changed quite a bit. The recent change has been really uncomfortable. I wish I could throw all my thoughts out there for the person to understand - from all the white lies to how I really really feel right now. But my reservations lies at how this will change things all over again. Where we no longer speak to each other...

I know I have 3 months to let it all go if all things heads to the place I hope it won't. But honestly, who am I kidding right? We all will miss the habits we both have had with the someone we thought we had a connection with. I am sure I will... being emotionally attached and all. T_T If only I could find a solution to my mind and heart.

Right now, how I wish this whole semester could start all over and I didn't let things transpire to where things have headed... But who am I kidding? If it was to happen all over again, I think I will do the same damn thing.

Ha, life. Why do you always go the way I wish you wouldn't go... ):