Results are coming out really soon, and I know my fate is near. Be it whether I am gonna keep up at it or just giving up on my dreams.
I really hope life would be a little kinder to me, give me a chance to step it up once more. I know I am more then this, I know I have made tons of mistakes but I am learning (being overly ambitious thinking I can handle 21 hours of lesson, struggling but refuse to get help and YES superrrrr overestimating my abilities.) Now its not about doing well getting the perfect results but being humble (I NEED THE HUMBLE PIE) and surviving till the end of the entire course which means graduation.
I am not afraid to say I am doing really badly in my chosen major, cause reality is staring right back at me. But if I am given another chance I am willing to do what it takes cause I have found whatever I have been looking for this holiday, the DETERMINATION (one that I have forgotten after my success in the polytechnic) as well as being super complacent about all the people around me (all the smart people who are studying in the local university who are much more hard working and smarter then me).
I know I have made some pretty bad choices, but sometimes we have to learn from them in order to ease up on the ego I have built up for my academic career. If only I am given another chance this coming friday...
If only....
Whatever it is, I am going to take whatever god has placed in my hand and take it as it is. Cause it's never about taking that one route, evidential in my WHOLE ACADEMIC CAREER. Life has it's way of coming around and making people understand. I will learn and make it there someday, if it's really that bad, I know I can... it's just a matter of how long... (:
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